You woke up besides me one am some 4decades ago and uttered those words, “marry me or I leave”
Lady Di is 60 now, meaning that she was about 20 when she gave Charly Boy that ultimatum. This, to me shows that she already defined what she wanted out her relationship with him, even if he hadn’t yet made up his mind. I have never been a fan of casual dating, i.e Dating For Dating’s Sake. Define what you what when you are going into a relationship so that you will avoid stories that touch much later. Right here on Nairaland a user complained that his girlfriend who was already giving him wife benefits was ‘rushing him’ by requesting for his house keys. Meanwhile he is chopping the punna and enjoying the domestic help she is rendering, but when she indicates she wants a degree of commitment, he comes online to complain that he is feeling pressured. So why then are you ‘dating’? Wanna eat your cake and have it?
Some men will give the excuse of ‘getting to know each other’ to suck every drop of your youthfulness before moving on to the next. You woke up besides me one am Note the bolded. Charly Boy was already enjoying wife benefits in the relationship.
This is the reason why women should never give too much of themselves to men because it will make them complacent. This is also why a man will turn a woman to Lady of the Ring, or make her abort all the children God gave her, and then when he meets someone else who has her dignity intact, will dump the aforementioned with lame excuses.
If you’re even unlucky, you will read about your ‘darling boyfriend’s’ wedding on Facebook. Despite being only 20, Lady Diana knew what she wanted out of her relationship with Charly Boy, and when he became complacent, she took the bull by the horns and gave him the ultimatum that reset his brain.
DON’T EVER BE ASHAMED TO DEMAND DEFINITION FROM YOUR PARTNER. People say a woman who knows what she wants and demands it from her man is ‘desperate’. Will you say Lady Di was ‘desperate’ at age 20? Ladies never, and I repeat, NEVER let anyone waste your time. Don’t let anyone give you hope needlessly and then does not follow through. Do your research and prayerfully inquire about your partner before you go far in that relationship, and if he is dragging his legs, give him the ‘Diana Ultimatum’. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being proactive in your relationship and don’t allow anyone tell you it is a thing of shame. Go for it. Just go for it. The result will be very enlightening in all dimensions.
Again, this where definition comes in. But then again, people enter relationships for a variety of reasons; some for the nacks and others for the long haul. Be wise. Don’t be a time waster, neither should allow your precious time be wasted. I no marry U due to lack of options. I marry you for one pure and selfish reason: I figured that the little girl in you will make the boy in me a peaceful & happy man. I’m guessing he took a step back and reviewed his relationship with this lady and came to the conclusion above.
You know, sometimes all it takes is a little, or in some cases, a firm nudge for that special person in your life to take the bold step. This nudge opens their eyes to what they are toying with because it is very easy to take people in your life for granted and you don’t know what you have till it’s gone. When you find your soul mate, hold fast to them because for so many, lightening does not strike twice. 40 years on, the rest is enviable history.
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